8333	Forums / Main Forum / Tell Me Why.	on: October 17, 2006, 06:24:50 PM
Steve, I believe because a long time ago in the wild blue yonder God decided to include me in His family. I had no desire to have a relationship with Him. I loved myself too much to humble myself before Him. I still struggle with that and i really believe that He loves me now. But in-spite of my arrogance He still loves me. I believe because every day He makes me believe in Him. I go up and down in my relationship with Him. I am always wandering away from Him, and so i have a very bad problem that only He can help me with. No one around me knows what is going on in my mind. No one around me knows what will happen to me in the future. No one around me cares about me like Him because they do not understand me like He does. He knows just what i need when i need it. He has designed the circumstances in my life for my good and for His glory. He sees me in the big picture in His plan in a group of people, i can only see the small picture. He is the only one that really listens to me. Because He can understand my pain better than any other person on the face of the earth since He has gone through so much more pain than i would ever experience. He loves me no matter what. Even when i am so weak that i have no strength to live good He still loves me. He loves me when i sin, and sin, and sin. He loves me when i am cold and heartless. He loves me when i have nothing to give. He loves me when i am afraid, and lonely, and suffering, and depressed, and quietly suffering, and faithless, and uncaring, and angry, and fretting, and when i am so addicted to sin so that i see no way to get from under its weight, in these dispositions is when He shows me how much He loves me. It is when these circumstances are the greatest is when His love is the greatest. He supports me by giving me things for free. He gives and gives and gives, and I take and take and take. And when i get fixed on something He gives He still loves me. When i love these gifts more than Him HE STILL LOVES ME. It is when i realize that He loves me inspite of the awful predicaments i get myself in is when i love to come and pour out my hurt to Him and thank Him for loving me